when I was a kid my mom had to intervene and make me stop saying “farewell” instead of “goodbye” because elderly relatives complained that it sounded like I expected them to die before I could see them again
people complain that my manner of writing is “stilted” and “pretentious” NOW but hooooly hell you should have seen it when I was a kid
I shit you not, the first line in one of my journals was “I am but a lass of nine years of age.”
#when my friends hamster died i said that he ‘’fell’’ like they said abt ppl dying in war
We would have gotten along swimmingly.
When I was about five my dad and I were joking around and he said “You’re a weirdo.” I then said, and I quote, “I suppose I am a rather odd child, are I not?”
I think about that a lot
I once described myself as “very queer indeed” on a school assignment, long before I ever figured that I am, indeed, very queer, in every sense of the word.
On the first day of kindergarten, they introduced us to our principal. I didn’t have the barest inkling of how Normal Humans greet authority figures, but I had read some books about knights and kings, so… I uh.
I bowed deeply and kissed my principal’s hand.
You just fucking didn’t though
You’re right, actually… and that’s the worst part. I didn’t kiss my principal’s hand – I kissed the hand of a different old bald man who happened to also be in the school library at the same time, and looked superficially similar to my principal.
wow I always look at old tumblr famous posts in a whole new light upon finding out this is Ship again
Sometimes I wish I could go back and tell my younger self that, for all the isolation and awkwardness I endured in the moment, my embarrassing social failures would one day entertain tens of thousands of people and help me make friends at work.
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Gay Ryan 