oystersaintforme:

shuricallme:

It’s like two people who don’t exist are interacting

this is a video of two people who accidentally find out that they’re both extraterrestrials after they realize they speak the same language unheard anywhere on earth and jimmy fallon realizes what is happening and he tries to put a stop to it because if the government finds out about it they’ll kill all three of them

peter-pantomime:

lolotehe:

keplercryptids:

thetumblrofrassilon:

operativesurprise:

keplercryptids:

keplercryptids:

I spent the afternoon arranging our books by size and color (and it’s so satisfying and looks amazing) and my partner came home and stared in shock at the bookcase and then said “i’m a librarian, you can’t do this.”

him: you split up all the song of ice and fire books

me: yeah i know, they’re all primary colors, it’s perfect

him: [self-destructs]

You’re a monster

As a former bookstore employee, this hurts my soul. I mean, sure it looks nice, but how do you find anything?

it has occurred me during this process that apparently not everyone thinks about books by what color they are? like, literally when i’m looking for a book, i picture it in my mind. i have a very…tactile experience with the books i read and idk! i thought everyone did that lol.

my partner was like “how will i find [this book] for instance” and i replied “easy, it’s purple” and he looked at me like i was a witch.

my boss wants me to organize the Harry Potter table by stack height not by book number help

queer-cosette:

one-time-i-dreamt:

I found a body in the woods and reported it to the police, only to find the same man alive and well in those same woods later. I tell him, “They found your body!” and he laughs. “No they haven’t,” he says. Then he pats a big bag hanging from a tree. “It’s right in here!” 

Tumblr’s new thing of not including the op’s url when something’s reblogged directly from the source is going to one day give me a heart attack